What Pam, My Accountant, Taught Me

This was a week of reckoning for me–– I visited my accountant, Pam, for tax preparation. 

I’ve been going to Pam for just four years, yet I feel like we went to high school together.  She’s gracious, funny, competent and I trust her completely.  That’s a wonderful feeling to have for someone especially when you see them once a year under “somewhat” unpleasant circumstances!

While putting my tax stuff together, it occurred to me just how patient Pam is.  I’m not sure why I thought of this; perhaps it’s because of my recent postings on dealing with difficult people.  While I don’t intend to be difficult, the last two years I showed up at her office not having all the info she needed.  And yet she remained beyond friendly.

This time, I made it a point to thank her for her patience and complimented her people skills.  She was both surprised and flattered––and then told me something that both surprised and impressed me.

There was a time in her life when she had little interest in accounting.  She thought banging away at numbers would be beyond boring.  She became an accountant, though, and quickly discovered that there’s more to it than crunching numbers. 

There are people. 

People don’t just give her figures to plug into tax forms.  People tell her stories about those numbers.  She listens to the successes and fears and confusions swirling through those numbers.  There are times when she feels like she’s part therapist, part priest.

She loves her job because she loves people’s stories.

However, not everyone has a story she wants to hear.  When she started out on her own she was desperate for business.  She’d take anyone on as a client.  Now, though, she’s reached a place in her career where she doesn’t have to work with everyone who comes a ‘knocking.

She recently “fired” a client. 

He was chronically late in getting info to her, had an attitude, and complained that she wasn’t delivering.  Then, one day, he yelled at her.  She stopped him––he didn’t have permission to yell at her.  It was then she realized that she didn’t have to work with this man.  She didn’t need or want him in her life.  And so she terminated their relationship. 

Pam is fortunate.  She works for herself and is in a place where she consciously can decide with whom she wants to work.  While not all of us might be in that financial position, each of us can consciously decide––what and who am I willing to tolerate and why? 

Everyone who is in your life is there because you invited him or her.  Yes, even your family.  Why are the people who are in your life, in your life?  Is anyone there who is zapping your emotional (and physical) energy?  Why do you tolerate them?

This year Pam saved me money––and reminded me of an important lesson when dealing with difficult people. . .