A human life is not a life until it is examined;
it is not a life until it is truly remembered and
appropriated;
and such a remembrance is not something passive but
active. . .
the creative construction of one’s life.
Oliver Sacks
A friend of mine, Ted (names changed), is in the throes of a
job search. He’s interviewed at one
company that seems interested as they asked him to take an Emotional
Intelligence assessment. His answers
were analyzed into a fifty-page report!
He was pleasantly surprised by much of what the report outlined and
disagreed with some aspects of the diagnosis.
I’m not a fan of personality assessments as I think they’re limited in
how they can actually help a person. I
don’t think the results allow for a person to “appropriate” who they are in all
their nuance and complexity. Taking an
assessment is not the same as examining one’s life.
This summer I was an instructor at
a three-day college essay writing boot camp for seniors at a private high
school. As you may know, part of the
college application process requires at least one, sometimes two essays. The prompts are common to all schools. Check out some of the prompts that high
schoolers across the U.S. are writing about:
1.
Evaluate a significant experience, achievement, risk
you have taken, or ethical dilemma you have faced and its impact on you.
2.
Indicate a person who has had a significant
influence on you, and describe that influence.
3.
Describe a character in fiction, a historical
figure, or a creative work (as in art, music, science, etc.) that has had an
influence on you and explain that influence.
4.
Describe the world you come from — for example,
your family, community or school — and tell us how your world has shaped your
dreams and aspirations.
5.
Tell us about a personal quality, talent,
accomplishment, contribution or experience that is important to you. What about
this quality or accomplishment makes you proud and how does it relate to the
person you are?
6.
The lessons we take from failure can be
fundamental to later success. Recount an
incident or time when you experienced failure.
How did it affect you and what did you learn from the experience?
7.
Reflect on a time when you challenged a belief
or idea. What prompted you to act? Would you make the same decision again?
Imagine you were applying for a job
and the director of H.R. handed you these prompts and asked you to select two
and write a six-hundred and fifty word essay on each. Could you do it?
I worked with an impressive group
of seniors and each of their approaches to selecting an essay impressed and
moved me. Jared loves molecular biology
– it’s what makes him come alive. Darren still wrestles with the death of his
dad who taught him the importance of devoting ten thousand hours to whatever
skill he wants to master. Lacey is a
nice Jewish girl who went away to summer school and had the shock of her life –
she became friends with a Jordanian Muslim.
Ted has a diagnosed OCD condition that complicated his coming out gay to
his family and friends because he needed to do it “perfectly.” When Eddie began high school he went around
saying, “I’m not just a freshman” and he’s been resisting labels ever
since. David used to play soccer until
he climbed on a surf board, caught his first wave and found inner calm.
I was moved working with these kids
as they agonized over what prompt to choose and what story to tell. I marveled at their excitement as they
realized they did have a story to tell, that they are different today than when
they began high school. I thrilled as
each released his or her grip on fear and found their own individual
voice.
The wonder of the boot camp was
seeing each kid learned how to live a life worth examining and sharing. And they learned this greatest of skills by
being willing to not worry if a particular story is what “they” (school
admissions officers) want to hear but worry rather – does this story tell who I
am?
What about you – what’s your story?
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