How Hungry Are You?

There are three hungers that people are trying to feed throughout their lives. The first is to connect deeply with the creative spirit of life. The second is to know and express your gifts and talents. The third is to know that our lives matter. Fulfillment comes from feeding these three hungers.

Richard Leider, executive

I came across this quote a couple of weeks ago; I printed it out taped it to the wall behind my desk.  It sits there as a quiet reminder and challenge.

When I first read it, my knee jerk reaction was to ask myself how deeply am I connected to my creative spirit; how satisfied am I with how I express my gifts; and do I believe that my life matters?

Each morning I’d ask myself: “How hungry am I?  How satisfied is my hunger?”

Slowly, though, I found myself asking harder questions: “Am I aware of feeling hungry or have my senses been numbed?  Do I value my gifts or do I so disparage them so that I don’t even value them as “gift.”  Do I trust people enough to allow myself to feel the weight of their care for me or do I easily brush off love proffered?”

I’m now venturing into TMI territory, but. . .for much of my adult life, I’ve lived with, wrestled with, major clinical depression.  I’ve been fortunate in that I’ve had a support system, professional and personal, that has bolstered me so that not only can I function, but I can succeed in so many facets of life.

When people ask me about depression it’s frustrating to explain what it’s like because almost any explanation can easily sound like irresponsible self-pitying.  At times I wonder if I’m just offering piss-ant excuses for being lame-ass lazy!  That’s usually when I think I’m taking leave of my mental faculties.

Perhaps, though, the best way to describe depression (my experience of it) is that it blurs my vision.  I’m not able to recognize what is in front of me—love, opportunity, gifts, reasons for hope and excitement.  It brings about distortions so that when I say I struggle with depression what I mean is that I struggle with righting a distorted view of life.  Yes, there’s often been a physical struggle to muster energy, but more than that it’s about being able to draw a sense of urgency and commitment from the bounty surrounding me.

Although I’ve been wanting to blog about this quote since I came across it, I hadn’t intended for it to be a reflection on clinical depression.  Yet, every time I turn to this quote, I know in my gut that the author is so right—life is about making sense out of these three hungers.  I occasionally meet a person who lives his or her life in a way that daily feeds these hungers.  But then I meet so many others who, while not diagnosed with depression, live a hungry life.  Some are unable to name their hunger and why it makes them restless and distracted.  Others know where the hunger comes from and yet feel hopeless, lacking the “recipe” that will satiate their hunger.  And for others, they simply feed on junk food to satisfy the hunger and so become dull and vegetate.

What about you?  Sit with this quote for a bit and let it speak to you.  How hungry are you?  How do you satisfy that hunger?  How do you help feed the hungry in your life?

Someone once said that “the world’s a banquet and most poor slobs are starving to death.”  What’s holding you back from joining the banquet?